Category Archives: Jokes

Please But

OKay, this joke is a bit difficult to explain, but I’m going to try because it’s one of my favorite ones.

A deaf man comes up to a railroad crossing. The railroad “guards” are down. So he waits for a bit. Soon it becomes apparent that they are not going to come up, so he gets out of his car and goes to a little railroad building next the the road. He knocks on the door. A man opens the door. The deaf man points to his ear and shakes his head to show that he is deaf. The other man gets a pen and paper and writes down “What can I do for you?” The deaf man writes back: “Please but”.

Look under the cut if you don’t get the joke. This is an ASL joke so it requires knowing some ASL to get it, but not much. So if you know some, sign what the deaf man wrote to yourself and think about it. Don’t rush in for the answer. If you don’t know ASL, then go ahead and look under the cut.

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TTYs

A man was driving down the road. On either side there were phone lines. On one phone line a bird was sitting peacefully, on the other, the man could see the bird doing a funny dance. Puzzled, he stopped at a near by convenience store. Still puzzled, he asked the store manager about the bird doing the strange dance. Oh! The man replied. That’s the TTY line.

Although, most TTYs today are sitting in closets, collecting dust, they are very well known for the amount of noise the make when callers type on the keys. I bet at work that drives the co-worker in the next cubicle crazy!!

More Jokes

I went to a Web site the other day during my lunch break to look for deaf jokes. I spent my lunch break laughing and sharing the laughter with others I thought might appreciate the jokes. My absolute favorite ones on the Web site I found was:

AIDS:
One day at the end of a church meeting, the person conducting asked, “is there was anything more that needs to be brought up before we end the meeting?”
One of the oldest members slowly raised his hand. “Yes. I guess I should tell you that I’m going to have to resign my position.”
Most of the members around the table looked surprised at the gentleman.
He continued, “I went to the doctor the other day. I now have AIDS.”
Astonishment filled the room. As they starred at him in amazement, he went on.
“It’s true. I now have an aid in my left ear and another in my right ear!”
(Kerry Rasmussen from Ogden, Utah swears this is a true story.)

SYMPTOMS
Doctor, I think I’m losing my hearing!
What are the symptoms?
It’s a show about a little yellow family, but what
has that got to do with my problem?

(If you don’t get it, look under cut for the joke)

Lifeprint.com


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Deaf and the court

If a deaf person was taken into court, would it still be called a hearing?

Joke

A deaf couple are on a road trip. They get tired and decide to pull over and spend the night in a hotel. They check in and the wife goes to sleep right away. The husband wants a drink, so he leaves the room to find a vending machine. Upon returning, he finds that he has forgotten which hotel room he is in. Unsure of what to do, he gets an idea. He goes to the car, opens the door and honks the horn, loud. The lights in every hotel room, save one, turn on. Aha! He thinks. He has found his wife!